mermaids don’t have thigh gaps but they can still lure men to their deaths
Fact: Pansexuals are assigned one power exclusive only to them at birth. However, the more pansexuals are born, the more unique their powers get. It is rumoured that pansexual rapper Angel Haze, for instance, was given the power to rap exceptionally well, while Pete the Pansexual, who lives down the road, is just a really good parallel parker.
IF WE LOSE POWER I’M QUITTING
JUST GIVE ME 20 FUCKIN MINUTES FOR MY CHICKEN NUGGETS TO COOK PLEASE
(vegan) I hope your power runs out
thats fuckin nice and all but the chicken is already in the nuggets. the power going out doesn’t save a chicken. it’s a nugget already. sorry
Adulthood doesn’t mean you stop drinking juice pouches and eating fruit snacks. It means buying your own.
and mixing them with vodka
At 3 in the morning while marathoning your favorite show because nobody can tell you to go to bed.
And then regretting your decisions the next morning.
Because you have to work.
and make more money to buy fruit snacks and juice pouches.and vodka